The Eye-Opening Moment I Realized I Was Actually a Miranda from Sex and the City

Remember when we all label ourselves as characters from Sex and the city? For Gen Z readers who may have overlooked this cultural trend, being labeled “the Miranda” by a group of friends had a totally negative connotation. Translation: It meant you were cheeky, couldn’t date someone, and lacked chic style.

This explains why, for the first 23 years of my life, I identified myself as Charlotte (played by Christine Davis). My formative years were filled with pearls, tiaras, Chanel knockoffs, and the desire to marry a wealthy lawyer or doctor. However, as I got older, I realized that I wanted more than an Upper East Side apartment and a Cavalier King Charles Spaniel to call a companion.

So, I launched into my career, which included a short stint in public relations, and realized that love to work. Waking up and doing my job every day feeds my soul. Not really. It does.

Of course, Carrie (Sarah Jessica Parker), Samantha (Kim cattrall) and Miranda (Cynthia nixon) were all career-driven women, so this didn’t necessarily help me place myself in one category over another. Instead, it was my post-college interactions with friends and other important people that helped me realize my truth: I am a Miranda, and with great pride.

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Miranda didn’t always get the best bedside deal (“She just doesn’t like you that much,” she once told a group of strangers, “So go ahead”) but she’s never afraid to keep it real. Who could forget the moment when Miranda lashed out at Carrie for agreeing to have lunch with Big (Chris Noth)? I certainly haven’t, because I’ve done something similar.

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Like Miranda in that scene from season three, I was once frustrated by a friend’s constant backsliding with a toxic ex. It had been years of intermittent behavior and I couldn’t hear more about it. So, I chose to recite all the red flags that the suitor had displayed in their relationship backwards.

And, as if channeling the red-haired lawyer herself, I made my argument fiercely and loudly, much to my friend’s disdain. In hindsight, I should have kept my opinions to myself and let my friend experience her own romantic journey. However, at the time, I thought I was being a loyal friend by giving her some tough love.

It was after this encounter that I had my reveal of Miranda, which made me see the heavily criticized character in a new light. No, Miranda isn’t perfect, but she’s a pit bull to her friends, witty, forward-thinking, and unapologetic.

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Although I have tried to soften my expression over the years, I refuse to give up my fiercely loyal personality of telling it like it is, and I hope other Miranda feel the same.

For more information on Miranda and company, watch the first two episodes of And so … on HBO Max now.

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